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The Perfect Wife: porn use in Utah

MAGNA, Utah (ABC 4 News) - A Harvard study finds right now, Utahns subscribe to web-based porn more than any other state in the nation and two thirds of subscribers are men.
MAGNA, Utah (ABC 4 News) - She says she's no June Cleaver. She's a modern mom from Magna happily married for more than two decades.

But this woman, who asked to have identity concealed, is deciding to share her story with ABC4 about her husband’s porn addiction.

Like many Utah women, a problem with pornography packs on the pressure she feels to be the perfect wife.

A Harvard study finds right now, Utahns subscribe to web-based porn more than any other state in the nation and two thirds of subscribers are men.

Behavioral expert Kimile Pendleton said that can send their female partners over the edge.

“That can lead to horrible depression, suicidal thoughts and tendencies,” said Pendleton. “I've seen women just go into this funk about who they are who they're not.”

The woman from Magna has been married to a porn addict for 22 years which at times makes her feel horrible about herself. “Like dirt. I have felt insignificant. I have felt like I wasn't worth even being in a marriage, being a mother, like I wasn't worth anything,” she said.

According to Pendleton, those feelings are down right dangerous for a woman's mental health. “This is where someone would get in trouble trying to be the perfect wife because you putting out ten times a day, you dressing in lingerie, you wearing a teddy to bed every night, you making dinner every night. Whatever you're doing to illicit some sort of response over there, it's not going to be a guarantee. There's no guarantee that this guy's not going to look at porn,” she said.

The magna wife said she's right, after years trying to pound out porn she realized her husband’s obsession with dirty digital downloads had nothing to do with her.

“You need to look at the addiction as an addiction,” she said. It’s an addiction that's rampant across the state. In fact, residents in some Utah counties watch porn more than any other place in the country.

The top five viewing areas are in San Juan County, Sevier County, Salt Lake City and southwest Salt Lake and Morgan County to the north.

Pendleton said with such a prevalent problem women need to stop blaming themselves.

“If he's getting drunk is that her fault? She could take it personal that way, if he's snorting cocaine, is it her fault?” she said.

The Magna mom says no, but tough questions did help her get by.

“You might have to ask some hard questions,” she said, “I did and they were answers I didn't want, but I needed.”

“It doesn't have to break you. You lose your legs, you can rise again. You lose your marriage, you can rise again. You lose a child, painful, but you can rise again,” she said.

The woman in our story says despite his weaknesses, her husband is the love of her life and with the help of counseling and several support groups she plans to keep it that way.

Click here to see all of our Perfect problem stories.
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