Change Yourself, Change Your Partner

Change Yourself, Change Your Partner

Can you change your partner just by changing yourself? Kimile Pendleton says yes!
Can You Change Your Partner Just by Changing Yourself?

Is it possible to change another person's behavior—and transform a less-than-perfect relationship—simply by changing your own thoughts?

The next time you become anxious over your partner's behavior focus on your own upsetting thoughts. Replace the inner partner-hating voice—"He/She's ruining my life!"—with a tender memory of your partner you once loved.

The internal shift in your attitude creates the external shift in his your partners attitude.

The notion that relationships succeed or fail according to how we think about them may seem far-fetched. The science of relationships has tended to emphasize modifying outward behavior—which is why most couples therapy is long and difficult and sometimes doesn't work.

The goal is to locate the pain at the source, which is in the beliefs and behavior that come from our thoughts—instead of trying to change our emotions or, even worse, other people's behavior.

This principle applies to all relationships and not merely to the ones we call romantic.

For this practice to work you must see that you are whole and complete by yourself and that your partner is not there to "complete" you. You are already whole without seeking any reassurance from outside yourself.

Give it a try and let me know how it goes for you.

Contact Kimile at

Page: [[$index + 1]]
comments powered by Disqus